Jon Stewart was a surprise host on “The Daily Show” Thursday, and sounded off on all of the “freedoms” Republicans claim are being taken away from Americans.
Like gas stoves! Stewart joked that he is on the GOP’s side in this battle, complaining that he cannot make his “signature bananas Foster, because Joseph ‘Goebbels’ Biden is trying to ban gas stoves.” The Republican hand-wringing is especially disingenuous because the Biden administration’s new standards don’t affect 97% of gas stoves already on the market.
“Look, no disrespect to any of these f---ing idiots,” Stewart said. “But I think we can move household appliances down on the ‘threat to democracy’ list just below aluminum-free deodorant.”
Calling it an obviously “overblown reaction,” Stewart wondered if there were “true horrors” being covered up before cutting to right-wing media outlets decrying how the Boy Scouts are “dead” after the organization’s rebranding as Scouting America.
“While we were all fixated on the titillating details of the Stormy Daniels testimony, the Boy Scouts all died,” Stewart said. “I'm assuming, in a terrible s'mores explosion engineered by one Joseph Charles Manson Biden.”
And while the right-wing media would like you to believe that the Boy Scouts have changed their name in order to comply with the much-feared “woke” police, Stewart reminded everyone that the rebranding happened “partly because they started letting girls in five years ago, and partly because they had a giant molestation scandal.”
“Rebranding yourself is a tried-and-true formula for many such organizations,” Stewart said. “In fact, it's why the Catholic Church now goes by the name Gary.”
Enjoy!
One key outcome of Tuesday's primaries in Indiana: House Republican leaders will have even more implacable crazies to contend with next year, and we're surveying the damage on this week's episode of "The Downballot." Marlin Stutzman, a tea party OG who helped push out John Boehner, narrowly won the Republican nod to reclaim his old seat while the erratic Victoria Spartz (who voted to oust Mike Johnson while we were recording) successfully managed to "un-retire" more than a year after saying she wouldn't seek another term. Expect even more "GOP in Disarray" headlines come 2025!
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