I received an email this morning with the following breaking news and I thought I would share them with you.
I also would like help in putting together a list of bills we would like the Republican Congress to pass as quickly as the Sciavo bill for the benefit of all Americans.
More under the fold.
Other 293 Million Americans Waiting For Congress To Pass Bills For Them
The success of Congress's record-breakingly speedy passage of a bill specifically crafted for the parents and brother of persistently-vegetative Terry Schiavo induced a furor this morning as America's other 293 million inhabitants eagerly awaited their own "personal legislation."
"I can't wait," said seven-year-old Terry Dooley, who has petitioned Congress to pass legislation ordering Schwinn to give him a new bike.
Americans couldn't be happier that Congress is finally doing something for them. "Now, this is your government at work," said Piper Cobb, who has asked Congress for a law requiring credit card companies to give him an exceptionally low rate of interest with no late payment fees.
"The era of the individually targeted law has arrived," said Professor Anthony Garnabanzo. "Congress has finally abandoned the idea of forging general domestic policies that impact on the entire country."
Tammy Gamble of Illinois has asked Congress to pass a law stopping the accelerating erosion of health care benefits offered by her employer, Sears. "Pretty soon we will not be able to afford the cost of my cancer medication copayment," she said.
Garnabanzo traced the evolution of so-called "personally crafted" legislation back to the advent of George W. Bush's presidency. "When the Supreme Court created a personal private right of action protecting George W. Bush from counting the Florida ballots, it was just a matter of time before they started protecting other people."
I'll start the wish list myself:
1. A bill to exempt Dr. Frist from medical malpractice liability for making diagnoses via video (I am particularly interested in Dr. Frist telling me if SpongeBob is really gay and if the yellow color of his skin means that he drinks too much booze which is causing him a liver problem).
Your turn.