Now that Christmas season is over, and the beat up Santa Clause and Baby Jesus are licking their wounds, we have to start thinking about how we can keep Christians Right delusions about discrimination of Christians, and Bill O'Reilly from losing FNC paycheck.
Hence I now propose to kidnap all the Easter Bunnies, steal their chocolate eggs and demand ransom. Here is what you will need.
(see below fold)
* Some blessed chocolate carrots, or a bible (for bait)
* Duct tape to tie them up and gag them
* Plastic bags for waterboarding them
* Fox News phone number for demanding ransom.
* And of course, small cooler for storing all that chocolate I steal from the bunny.
Also we wiretapped Easter Bunny Association phones (illegally of course, no worries) so we will know when and where they are going.
That information will be provided via Jon Stewart show, just look for hidden messages, during Samantha Bee pieces.
Ready troops??? Aahhh-Tennn-hut....
Lets go!!!
Please recommend, we need more troops to fight the pink bunny scourage.