With the Cheney comment about American Idol I got to thinking about what would Bush sing and what would he say if he went on the show. I know there are 100's of serious posts and this isn't meant to take away from them. Maybe you'll get a chuckle. Just imagine this . . . .
Ryan: Welcome to American Idol. Over the past weeks we had Vice President Cheney on our show. We've had one more request and well, you know, you just don't say no to this man. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the President of the United States.
Hail to the Chief plays, Bush struts on stage with a smirk and a wave, the audience stands and cheers for 3 minutes.
Ryan: Mr. President welcome to American Idol sir.
President: Thank you Ryan. It's a real pleasure to be here.
Ryan: Why did you want to come on the show Mr. President.
President: Well Ryan, you know this is the #1 show in America eh, eh smirk, smirk (applause, cheers). Laura and I watch every week. That Kellie girl is my favorite but Laura likes Ace. Anyway, I have a very important message for the American people so what better place to be than where all the people are. (audience cheers) Besides, they would have been really mad at me if the show was pre-empted for a press conference. So this is a Fox exclusive.
Ryan: That's very true sir. If we were pre-empted your approval rating would be 20%. But, being here on Fox among the true believers, your approval rating will get a boost. What is your message sir.
President: This is a hard job Ryan. My job is hard. We work everyday to keep the American people safe but its hard. Part of my job is to prepare the American people for the future. You know, when we went into Iraq we got rid of a bad man. But now there are a lot of bad men. We're still in the tunnel but we're beginning to see the light. That little, tiny light at the end of the tunnel. Its hard but we're getting there. But the American people have to know we aren't gonna get there while I'm President. Heck, we're not gonna get there for a long time. That' why we renamed the Global War on Terror. We now call it "The Long War." You know, its kinda like that book. You know the one. Rummy told me about it. I think it was called 1984. I don't remember that year real well though. So the American people have to stick to it. We can't cut and run. That would embolden our enemies. If we weren't over there, they'd be over here.
Ryan: So sir, what song are you going to do for us that will convey that message?
President: I selected "The Impossible Dream." This song conveys to the American people that I will never quit.
Ryan: Ladies and gentlemen it is my honor to present the President of the United States.
The President sings:
To dream the impossible dream,
to fight the unbeatable foe,
to bear with unbearable sorrow,
to run where the brave dare not go.
To right the unrightable wrong,
to love pure and chaste from afar,
to try when your arms are too weary,
to reach the unreachable star.
This is my quest,
to follow that star --
no matter how hopeless,
no matter how far.
Bush ends with a smirk. Standing ovation and cheers. The audience finally quiets.
Ryan: (with tears in his eyes) Mr. President that was just awe-inspiring. It is so wonderful to know that no matter what, you will stay the course. We, the American people know you will never change your mind. You will keep us safe so we can pursue our dreams like here on American Idol. I speak for everyone here at Fox when I say, you are our President sir. It's been an honor.
Bush smirks, waves and struts off stage. His job is done. Calls Cheney to ask "What should I do next?"