Oh my God! Did you see today's news? Barack Obama said:
I believe it's a lot easier to change the Constitution than it would be to change the word of the living God, and that's what we need to do is to amend the Constitution so it's in God's standards rather than try to change God's standards
Wait. WHAT? That wasn't Obama? It was Mike Huckabee? You mean he's the enemy, not Obama?
Yeah sure. But did you see the news where John Edwards admitted that he plans to keep the troops in Iraq for a hundred years? I mean, HOLY CRAP! Here's what he said... verbatim!
Q: President Bush has talked about our staying in Iraq for 50 years — (cut off by McCain)
McCAIN: Make it a hundred.
Q: Is that ... (cut off)
McCAIN: We’ve been in South Korea ... we’ve been in Japan for 60 years. We’ve been in South Korea 50 years or so. That would be fine with me.
Oh. Wait... I see now that I made a mistake. That was actually John McCain, not John Edwards. Silly me. I guess he's the enemy, not John Edwards.
Well, did you see what that unbelievable racist, Hillary Clinton said about black men? I've got the exact quote, right here -- guaranteed to blow your mind:
Given the inefficiencies of what D.C. laughingly calls the "criminal justice system," I think we can safely assume that 95% of the black males in that city are semi-criminal or entirely criminal.
If similar in-depth studies were conducted in other major cities, who doubts that similar results would be produced? We are constantly told that it is evil to be afraid of black men, but it is hardly irrational. Black men commit murders, rapes, robberies, muggings, and burglaries all out of proportion to their numbers.
Ooops! I did it again. (Sorry Britney) That wasn't Hillary at all! It was Ron Paul, back in his 1992 newsletter. Well, that's some egg on my face. I guess he's the enemy, not Hillary Clinton.
Well. Did you see where that total nutcase, Dennis Kucinich, like totally switched his position and started trashing health reform? Check it out -- this is what he said. Read it and weep:
You have got to see the trap. Otherwise we are in for a disaster. We are in for Canadian health care, French health care, British health care.
Never mind that Canada, France and the U.K. all have higher life expectancy and spend 45-60% LESS per person than we do... Oh wait. That wasn't Dennis Kucinich. It was privately-insured cancer-survivor, Rudy 91ul1ani. What a dumb bunny I am. I guess he's the enemy, not Dennis Kucinich.
Attention Hillary Haters, Barack Bashers, Edwards Enemies and Kucinich Condemners: I'm not saying to STFU; I'm not saying the primaries aren't worth fighting over. But don't forget for ONE FREAKING SECOND who we're really fighting in the fall. If you think that ANY of our candidates will be as bad as ANY of these GOP jokers, think again. If you're thinking about washing your hands of the whole bloody mess. Remember this: America is counting on you.