Okay, we need a light moment or two. Or ten.
Now some of the faithful have had their faith rattled of late over this one-day poll by Zogby. Sorry, by a tarot card reading by an astrologer who dowses part-time.
Here's the quick and dirty guide to Zogby. Remember that game Clue, where it was Mr. Mustard in the Billiard Room with the Wrench? Well, in this "murder of the truth" by Zogby, it was Mr. Magoo in Bizarro World on the chronic, metaphorically speaking.
Mr. Magoo, in Bizarro World, on the chronic. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Zogby has been a repeat source of teh stoopid in poll after poll. Our host Mr. Moulitsas here has been justly contemptuous of Zogby's operation and methodology many, many times.
If Zogby says McCain's a half point ahead, I cheer. I don't pop the champagne, but I chill it.
If Zogby says McCain's a point ahead, my pale, doughy white ass is running down South Dakota Avenue in Northeast DC hollering in celebration. Neighbors won't appreciate it but four days from now, they won't care, because Obama's going to take my precinct by a higher margin than he takes his own back in Chicago.
If Zogby says McCain is 1.5 points ahead, I am flying to Vegas 40 minutes after the concession speech by McCain for some serious wholesome fun, involving, beer, cigars, cheap dollar Texas Hold'em, sports book action on the Ravens and other entertainment I won't identify here in light of my impending divorce. Of course, doing this would require me to locate some money, which could slow the party down quite a bit.
If Zogby says Obama is down 2.0 points, I am leasing out my apartment in DC as a crash pad for Obamanauts who want to see the party on Inauguration Day, while I spend the next three months and, I hope, 8 years prouder of my nation than I have ever been in my adult life.
You get the idea?
But Zogby is doing us a favor. We should CAMPAIGN as if this Magoo Bizarro on-the-chronic little pollster who couldn't were right about his one-day poll. We should campaign as if we were barely behind? Why? Because a stupid bastard would fail to do it, and we are looking to replace, not reproduce, a fool.
So everybody, regarding this Zogby poll, you should take That One's advice:
and keep up the good fight. As our host says, leave it all on the road. And if you are in Northern Virginia, you might see me helping out, work and child care permitting.
But do it for the win, not to "avoid the loss" or overcome the Magoo Doom. Do it to rack up the biggest mandate for That One, because if ever a president needed one, President Obama needs one. The traditional media are going to be nothing but concern trolls with good health benefits on our president. We need as many members of Congress as possible to see Obama not only as smart but as occupying a commanding position in the hearts of the people of this country, so that he and they can get as progress made as possible as quickly as possible with a minimum amount of resistance.
Do it because you want to see the stupid shit that Palin will say in defeat. Do it because you want to see that woman stop winking at you/your husband/whomever.
Do it because you want to watch Fox News (!) and see Sean Hannity start using the words "President-Elect Obama" with a straight face.
Do it because you want to see catastrophic disaster inflicted on the operation of the Republican Party. Do it because you want to see the RNC broke with no wingnut "bailout." Do it because you want to hear the sound of the battleship dropped on their treehouse.
Do it because you want to hear the words, and SAY the words, "YES WE DID!"
But don't let Magoo bother you.