As many of you know, I'm a senior resident Daily Kos Limbaugh-logist because, frankly, someone from our side has to do it. And I've adjusted my brain to shield it from the harmful radiation a normal, healthy liberal mind is bombarded with when listening to Rush. Rush normally speaks in a rather wide manner so as to avoid being called out, but every now and then he tees one up for us to launch into the cheap seats. So it was with much joy in my heart that I heard Rush yesterday demand the following:
RUSH: I would like to challenge Barack Obama, who is running around demanding corrections from everybody else who misspeaks about him or who offends him, I would like to challenge Obama to prove where I ever said that immigrants ought to be rounded up and deported.
Okay, a little back story. Here's how this row started:
RUSH: This is last night on the campaign trail. And this is interesting, too. Since the media, the Drive-Bys, are paying more attention to me than they are Senator McCain, I guess Obama has decided he should shift his campaign and run against me.
OBAMA: When I hear Rush Limbaugh or some of these people talking about how we need to send 'em all back, we're not going to send 'em all back. First of all, this is a country of immigrants. Second of all, as a practical matter, we would end up having to use all of our law enforcement resources to round people up, detain them, separate families. It's not a realistic solution. We're not going to be able to solve the problem if we're just shouting about it.
RUSH: I don't know what... He's talking about immigration here, but I have never said deport these people. I have said it's not realistic.
In fact, Rush is quite certain he's been something of a patron saint when it comes to the immigrant community:
RUSH: I challenged him earlier to prove where I ever said that immigrants ought to be rounded up and deported. I've talked about other things, creating disincentives for companies that hire illegals would stop hiring them, you know, disincentives for illegals to keep coming and so forth, but I never have supported a full deportation roundup.
And so, Rush has had enough:
RUSH: He's trying to divide the nation using me and introducing race into this election by attacking me about deporting illegals. He's trying to play to the fears of Hispanic-Americans by attacking me and lying about what I said. He's playing to the fears of the Latino community, and I demand that he stop it. At least stop it in my name because I didn't say anything like he said I said.
Okay, so the table is set. Now – on to why Rush is full of crap. Let's take a look at what Obama actually said. He never used the words "mass deportation." Rush jumped there to set up a straw man argument ("the Hell you say," I know). What Obama actually said was:
"When I hear Rush Limbaugh or some of these people talking about how we need to send 'em all back, we're not going to send 'em all back."
And where did Obama get this crazy notion? Probably from Rush's words - specifically the Limbaugh Laws of Immigration (Unfortunately this link is restricted "member only" access).
RUSH: You're allowed no demonstrations, you cannot wave a foreign flag, no political organizing, no bad-mouthing our president or his policies, or you get sent home. You're a foreigner. You shut your mouth or you get out, and if you come here illegally, you go straight to jail and we're going to hunt you down 'til we find you.
You can see where Obama got confused. Specifically I think it came from the words "you get sent home" and "we're going to hunt you down 'til we find you."
So, Rush, I think it only fair that you apologize to Obama. You asked for proof – now you have it. This is where Obama got the ridiculous notion that you want to "send 'em all back."
But Rush did so much more with his "Limbaugh's Laws of Immigration." He detailed his plans to establish a permanent second-class citizenship for undocumented workers in America. So in the interest of fairness, here are Limbaugh's Laws of Immigration:
RUSH: All right, immigration proposals under discussion. Let me add mine to the mix. I want to call this proposal the Limbaugh Laws. ...First, if you immigrate to the United States of America, you must speak the native language. You have to be a professional or an investor. [America is] not going to take unskilled workers...There will be no special bilingual programs in the schools, no special ballots for elections, no government business will be conducted in your native language. Foreigners will not have the right to vote...nor will they ever be allowed to hold political office. According to the Limbaugh Laws, if you're in our country, you cannot be a burden to taxpayers. You are not entitled, ever, to welfare, to food stamps, or other government goodies. You can come if you invest here, but it must be an amount equal to 40,000 times the daily minimum wage. If you don't know have that amount of money, you can't come and invest. You have to stay home. If you do come and you want to buy land, okay, but we're going to restrict your options. You will not be allowed to buy waterfront property in the United States. That will be reserved for citizens naturally born in this country.
In fact, as a foreigner, you must relinquish individual rights to property... Another thing. You don't have the right to protest when you come here. You're allowed no demonstrations, you cannot wave a foreign flag, no political organizing, no bad-mouthing our president or his policies, or you get sent home. You're a foreigner. You shut your mouth or you get out, and if you come here illegally, you go straight to jail and we're going to hunt you down 'til we find you.
Wow...It's like a smörgåsbord of hate and intolerance. So much to choose from I don't even know where to begin. I'll just let you guys look over and enjoy the Limbaugh Laws. In the meantime, Rush, remember we "stupid little bloggers" are listening. Your crap didn't fly in 2006, and it won't fly in 2008 either.