One of these days, I certainly hope, George W. Bush will make his final Saturday Radio Broadcast. I decided to speculate about what he will say. If he gives the address I envision, the Democrats might forego a response.
I thought about this after getting another of those wingnut e-mails that want us to cut off all aid to all countries that did not join in our little "adventure" in Iraq. You know the kind I mean, those e-mails that proclaim our "victory" based on the fact that Sadaam Hussein is no longer in power.
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Those claims of victory, of course, don't take into account that by removing Sadaam Hussein we turned Iraq over to Iran. (They can't fathom that could ever, ever happen, since "we" have "liberated" the Iraqis from their dictator.) But enough introduction, on to the program:
"Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the President of the United States. As you know, back about five years ago, I did something really, really stupid. I ordered the invasion and occupation of Iraq after telling you a bunch of lies about their nuclear capabilities so you would buy into my little adventure. I really hated Sadaam Hussein and I got him. Unfortunately, everyone knows by now that he didn't have anything to do with the tragedy of September 11, 2001, even though I told you that lie as long as I could get away with it.
"I have some bad news for you today. We didn't have the money to pay for the invasion and occupation. We borrowed it from China figuring that our kids and grandkids would just have to deal with paying the bills. But now China wants their money and we can't afford to pay them.
"On top of that, our invasion and occupation have made your dollars almost worthless. It used to be that everyone wanted American dollars. Well, as late as 2003 everyone wanted American dollars. Now everyone wants those Euro things. Even the Canadian dollar is worth a lot more than American dollars are. That's why the price of oil went so high. Everyone buys barrels of oil in American dollars and since they keep losing their value, the price other people charge us keeps going up.
"But, hey, what the hell. I'm going to give you a $1200 tax rebate that you will have to pay taxes on next year. You'll either go out and splurge with it, or you'll just put it in your gas tank and it will all come back to me and my oil company family.
"Some people think I screwed America, that I screwed up. Well screw you, too.
"Sorry Osama Bin Laden is still around. I had to leave him alive and kickin' so I could keep you scared to death.
"But that's the way it is. So long suckers."
I know this just a fantasy. But so is the notion that we will be able to "punish" those countries that didn't "help" us when we invaded.