So, I've thought long and hard about it..and I've come up with a fool-proof plan to win the health care policies that will make our country the beacon of light it SHOULD be, in terms of offering even our most destitute of citizens excellent health care coverage. I have two different plans. I call them.. creatively enough.. Plan 1 and if that doesn't work, Plan B.
PLAN 1:
First of all, starting tomorrow, (Today is Sunday, ya know.. a day of rest!) I'm going to become a billionaire. I'm going to need help on this, but I have a little bit of savings in a jar by my bed. Given the fee that the machine in the grocery store charges to count it out, it should still be enough to start investing. Or I may go to Atlantic City. Any help you guys can give me here, would of course go towards this very worthy cause.
Then I'm going to call up Baucus, Conrad and the other Blue Dog Democrats. No.. even better. I'll fly down to see them, in my private jet. NO!! EVEN BETTER! I'll arrange for them to fly down to see me.. in the Bahamas! Definitely. I'll have a really nice rich corinthian leather-bound checkbook. (Hey, even vegans have to look impressive, sometimes!) I'll ask them how much the insurance companies have offered them for their wonderful representation, and then I'll smoothly double it. Why not? What's the point of being wealthy if you can't buy a government? I mean, isn't every one of those green presidential portraits we carry around in our wallets, really just a kind of stock certificate??? How much of this government you own?? I'll shake their hands, after they take the check, and then send them off to play golf. I'll even pay them to play golf. Goodness knows we don't want them in Washington doing any more damage. They all look like they could use some fresh air and exercise anyway.
Next, I'll call Rahm Emmanuel. I'll wait for him to answer the phone..and I'll shout "No RAHM! YOU'RE FUCKING STUPID!!!" and hang up. That'll be fun! Totally immature, but hell, he can relate to that.
Then I'll call Ms. Sebelius and inform her that I've just spoken to Rahm.. (I'll call him Rahmy!) and that after some words, we've decided to change our language. She'll be shocked at first, and I'll have to reassure her. "No, Kathy! That's adorable, but no, not change our language that way! Rahm can still use dirty words. What I mean is that from now on, indeed, the public option is no longer being mentioned. We're going full force for SINGLE PAYER! Pedal to the metal, baby!" I'll assure her that my trillion dollar corporation, (which I'm heading so as to make myself a billionaire, naturally) has got her's AND the President's back. Go forth and spread the word without fear, Kathy!
There is that part about getting the message out there, unscathed, and you know, the media has been the corporate world's bitch for oh.. ever. So, rather than try to fire the whole lot of them, I say we get our own satellites up there. Buy stations in every market. Appoint Rachel Maddow the director of all communications, and definitely find a spot for Olbermann, Seder, Cenk and all the others who made me feel like I wasn't the only one outraged over the last ten fucking years. (Thank you for that!)
And if, by any chance, none of that works,(but seriously, how could it not?) PLAN B:
I'll do what I've always been doing. Something, I used to believe was enough. I will vote. I will vote for the people I think best represent my desires to see Our Country improve. I will vote for the people who understand what the Constitution is all about. I will vote for the people who can't read the inscription below the Statue of Liberty without choking up, and swear to follow the trail that glorious woman is illuminating with her magnificent beacon. I'll believe in the change they promise and most likely get sickened with disappointment,..again. Yet, I'll keep voting, because I know that people died for the right: ARE STILL DYING FOR THE RIGHT, and to not do so is to spit on their graves.
I'll call the President's office, my Senator's office, my congressman. I'll pause patiently while the receptionist who answers the phone pretends to write my comments down. (She's actually playing spider solitaire on the computer.. it's addictive.) I'll start showing up to rally's again. (Remember how effective they felt back in the Vietnam days? Ugh, I do. That was when the media paid attention to anything besides furthering the corporate causes. Oh, the good old days.) I'll visit Crooksandliar.com, thedailykos.com, thinkprogress.com, and whatever flavor of the month website has people on it that are just as outraged as I am. I mean, face it, we're all preaching to the choir. But I just happen to love choirs. I love the people here. Then, with every paycheck.. with whatever I can spare, I'll try to add money to causes I like. I'll donate my little dollars to candidates with backbone, like Kucinich, Sanders and Weiner. I'll continue, in my role as a health care professional dealing with less than affluent patients, to do my very best to make their lives better. To ease their pain, help them rehabilitate, in the best way I can given the confines of our current system. I'll do whatever I can, and every time an insurance company stands in the way, I'll do my best to work around it,or I'll just suck it up and start again. It's the only way to make a difference.
I know.. Plan B doesn't have quite the punch as Plan 1. But you know... this is America. Our vote is supposed to count. Our voices are supposed to count. Our citizens, rich or poor are all supposed to count.. EQUALLY!!! It's what was supposed to make us great. Why shouldn't that be enough? 75 percent of the population want meaningful health insurance reform. The vast majority, when hearing the actual details of what Single Payer System is about, think it's a great idea. Why isn't that enough? Why the fuck isn't that enough?