This vent-hole (hereinafter known as IVH), if lost or stolen will not be replaced or purchase price refunded. Violation of IVH rules will result in expulsion without refund. A copy of IVH rules can be obtained from one or more members wearing tie-dyed oxford shirts after written requests. Admission to certain functions within the IVH may require additional innuendo, enter at your own risk. Frivolity and silliness are highly recommended for all riders. Flamewars are expressly forbidden and political ranting is strongly discouraged. Please consult your counselor, magistrate or religious functionary before usage. Comment below if you agree with said terms.
Thank you and have an IVH night.
Hello, hello...is this thing on?
Can you hear me in the back of the room?
Good.
Due to an unforeseen—and likely faked—illness on the part of your regular IVH host or hostess, I have been asked to step in and take over posting duties for tonight.
Hey, let's see you do a better job, schmuck!
My hosting will no doubt be a bit of a disappointment for those of you who are used to my...um...rollicking ways in the IVH comments of past days. Never fear—I will continue in that grand tradition in tonight's comments.
Yeah, and so's your mother!
When I was asked to take on this duty, I felt unworthy to the task—a task shouldered with such magnificent care by the likes of Oke, ericlewis0, cactusflinthead and others too numerous to mention (and who paid me to leave out their names, for fear of federal prosecution).
Listen, I write my own jokes, OK?
Anyway, I took on this job with a heavy heart, fearful of offending all that is good and decent about the people who hang out here (which isn't much, but I digress).
Until...until, that is, I saw who was on CF last night.
Wow. Edie Falco. The hottest, smartest, bestest actress in the whole world.
OK, fine, you slobber over Scarlett Johansson if you want; I prefer my women more mature.
She's been in Oz, Sopranos and now Nurse Jackie on HBO. Really, really nice performances.
Did I mention she's hot?
So, without further ado, here's last night's CF segment with Edie—enjoy.
Security, could you escort that a**hole in the first row outside, and kick him in the nuts while you're at it?
And, to finish the evening, what did we learn?