Been a rough day for me.
My 7 year-old had a melt-down this morning when I tried to get him to wear a warm coat outside and my nine year-old appears not to understand the concept of making her bed in the morning. On top of that, my wife and I had a knock down drag out over whether or not we should go to her mother's for the holidays.
I found myself feeling frustrated and angry and I couldn't figure out how to get my family to do what I wanted... so I sprayed pepper spray in their faces at close range.
To say the least... that made them see things my way!
Yes, yes... there was a lot of crying and pain, but as my children stood screaming "WHY?!? WHY?!" their eyes burning in pain, I was able to stand tall and say...
"Kids, get used to it. THIS is how we deal with dissent in America!"
And MAN, now that I know that it's all the rage for university chancellors and mayors and campus security types to do it... I'm handling every disagreement this way.
I've tasered my next door neighbor whose car was parked too close to my driveway and beat Ms. Mathews across the street with a nightstick because I REALLY don't like the political lawn sign that she has in her front yard.
There are friends who forgot my birthday... work associates who have not returned my calls... and the dude in the carpool lane, who is using the blow up "sexy friend" in his passenger's seat to qualify... I'm going to tail his ass all the way to Tarzana and SPPPPRRRAAAY!
And, I've SO got my fingers crossed that some city or college will take a page from the cops of yore and bring out the water cannons and the dogs, because... hell... THOSE were some of our PROUDEST moments when it came to silencing protestors.
I mean once those in power REALLY take the moral high ground and head back HERE...
...there won't be a problem in America that we can't solve, right?
Thank God we've learned something about quashing peaceful demonstrations in 50 years!
Bull Conner would be proud.