Jesus Christ, the renowned Jewish philosopher and religious scholar viewed by many as their Lord and Savior, will address a nationally televised joint session of the United States Congress this coming Tuesday, April 3, at 8 PM Eastern time.
According to officials, neither the purpose nor subject of Jesus’s historic address will be known in advance. When asked if this most unprecedented appearance is in any way related to a possible pending apocalypse, a representative of the enigmatic church leader cryptically responded, “Does He look Mayan to you?”
The announcement was made following a reportedly heated closed-door session of the Republican Congressional Caucus which was necessitated by a division within its ranks over whether or not to adopt the concurrent resolution necessary to convene a joint session...
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