Fresh from their loss at Wednesday’s city council meeting, fluoride opponents have chosen a new focus: water flammability.
In recent months opponents of water fluoridation have lobbied and protested the Portland City Council to prevent the council from voting in favor of fluoridation. Opposition groups have argued that the fluoride to be added to drinking water is full of toxic chemicals such as lead, arsenic, old lace, and even sometimes fluoride.
Now, in light of the council’s decision to approve fluoridation, opposition groups report they’ve discovered extensive existing pollution in Portland’s drinking water supply that requires the city to shut down the water supply and halt all modifications until the pollution is removed.
“We have concrete proof that Portland’s water supply is polluted with a deadly gas known as hydrogen,” said Stuart Pidhick, president of the fluoride opposition group NO-RIDE, “Hydrogen is both deadly to humans, and also highly flammable.”
Pidhick was quick to react to a city employee who commented that water is made from hydrogen. “So you admit it!” Pidhick replied, “This should have been voted on by the people!”
When questioned about his claim that hydrogen is toxic to humans, Pidhick replied, “You just try breathing 100% hydrogen for an hour, and you’ll see how harmful it is.” Pidhick also stated that his belief in hydrogen toxicity is based on the results of a study conducted in rural China where children drank water containing extremely high concentrations of naturally-occurring arsenic and fluoride. “Those kids suffered from many health problems due to all the hydrogen in the water,” said Pidhick.
Environmental scientist May Dupname attempted to reassure Pidhick that even though water contains hydrogen, the hydrogen will not burn unless first separated from the oxygen molecules, and then ignited by a spark.
Pidhick was quick to denounce this explanation, saying, “Don’t you watch history? It was burning hydrogen that brought down Led Zeppelin.”