Meteor Blades reported recently that the Texas crybabies now number over 115,000 signatures on the White House petition to secede from the union.
That is more than 3 times the next leading contender of sore losers in neighboring Louisiana with 30 something thousand.
The population of Texas exceeds 25 million.
Louisiana has 4.5 million people according to the 2010 census
Texas votes for Romney were about the same as the population of Louisiana, 4.5 million. Louisiana gave Romney 1.15 million votes.
So, the knuckle draggers that have signed the petition to secede represent what percentage of the GOP in these states? I'm glad you asked, I have a calculator.
Texas: 115,000 knuckle draggers (some out of state, I know) out of 4,500,000 = 2.555%
Louisiana: 30000 knuckle draggers out of 1,150,000 = (amazingly) 2.60869%
Is this proof that knuckle draggers are a consistent component of the GOP from state to state? Probably. Does this mean that 2% of Democratic voters are similarly afflicted? No, shut up. Don't think about it.
Got me thinking of what should be the White House response, and I think it might be fun to get "y'alls" help on this. (what is the plural of "y'all"?)
The plural of y'all is
"all y'all"
So, let's look at some of the options for an official White House response to the knuckle draggers.
Governor Romney supported a program of "Self-Deportation". Please take his advice.
Enclosed is a compass, Mexico is generally "West, Southwest" Bring your landscaping equipment, we set up a jobs program for you.
Thank you for giving the election results so much thought, on behalf of the 99.98% of the rest of the population of your state, we have decided that history should repeat itself. Enclosed is your share of the deed to the TEXIANA RESERVE, located on the border of Texas and Louisiana. This half square mile of prime real estate is rich in natural resources. Mostly aquatic, with a high population of reptilian fauna and flora consisting of cypress and milfoil. Since you signed your real name, (unbelievably dumb of you) the relocation is mandatory. Yes, there will be a fence to keep the rest of us out.
Have fun, post your own "official White House responses", and don't take any of this too seriously. I hope I haven't offended the 99% of Texas and Louisiana that is capable of critical thinking. I especially hope I haven't offended any Native Americans by bringing up old wounds. If my 6am calculator proficiency is as fuzzy as my slippers, I apologize for any math errors.