Saying Goodbye to Eastbound and Down
Last night, HBO broadcast the final segment of their original serialized drama, Eastbound and Down. The show follows the adventures of Kenny Powers, a has-been baseball player with an overdeveloped sense of his self-worth. Like many of HBO's made-for-primetime adult soap operas, Eastbound and Down has fascinating characters and unforgettable plots, and has become its own meme. Eastbound and Down adds huge portions of humor that manages to be howling funny and embarrassingly cringe-worthy at the same time.
Sadly, the series has now ended, but not before delivering what has to be the best take-down of whacky Evangelical fervor to hit the small screen. In this scene, Kenny Powers has been called up to the big leagues and sits in the locker-room, contemplating the imminent start of his first game. His trainer, played by Matthew McCaughney, comes in to check on him.
MM: How ya doin' Kenny?
KP: Ya, I'm doing good.
MM: Well, there's no time for a pep talk. I would like to take a knee here with you – say a prayer. Will you pray with me?
KP: To Jesus?
MM: Yessir.
KP: Fuck, ya.
MM: Dear Jesus. We come to you with gratitude on this eventing with thanks for shepherding this man, Kenny Powers to a personal victory. The fact that we sit with you now in this clubhouse is proof, that Kenneth Powers has successfully sucked his training's dick, Lord. Thank you.
KP: Thank you Jesus for that.
MM: Kenny sucked, Kenny stroked, Kenny learned to breath through his nose while doing it. Kenny found a free finger to touch ass along the way, and that took commitment. With You, and I, and Kenny know there is much more to come. The finish line, Jesus
KP: Hallelujah.
MM: Give him strength of fist to stay among the stroke, that you relax his throat to embrace this bulging opportunity.
KP: Give me strength, fucking Jesus.
MM: Give him strength
KP: Endless strength, fucking Jesus.
MM: It's gonna bring that fortified ejaculation, and tonight for the first time in his own public demonstration in front of You, and the world, Jesus
KP: Super-chill, Jesus Christ.
MM: It's come time, and it's up to you, Kenny: spit or swallow. You know the answer. Thank you, Jesus. Amen
KP: Fuck ya, Jesus. Amen.
A video clip of the scene can be found here:
http://www.youtube.com/...
Too bad Blockbuster went under. I want to go back and see the entire series, in order.
Goodbye, Eastbound and Down, and thank you for the smiles.