If the government bails out a bankrupt Detroit, will that mean President Obama owns Ted Nugent?
Cause I think I'd like that.
What a relief that Kate Middleton gave Prince William a male heir. I'd hate to see her get beheaded.
George Zimmerman rescued a family from an overturned truck. The best part is, he didn't shoot them.
Prediction: In 2014 the Democrats will lose the Senate due to twerking.
Yes, Soylent Green was people, but they were definitely organic, free-range people.
There's a fine line between religion and man's inability to accept that he's here for no reason. Just kidding, there is no fucking line.
Take inspiration where you find it. In the flight of a bird over water, in the brilliance of a rainbow, in the glory of that fine ass.
Learning the path to happiness is as simple as knowing where the weed at.