Last month, a Texas appeals court overturned Tom DeLay's conviction on money laundering charges after finding the case "legally insufficient to sustain DeLay’s convictions." Although the prosecution has promised to appeal the decision, DeLay sees the Hand of the Almighty at work and is now vowing to lead the the Republicans Righteous to cleans Washington of the wicked people that torment it. He has since been appearing on any outlet that will have him to let good Christians know that God has personally chosen him to lead them out of their political desert, directly to the throne of the Oval Office. Oh, and to also let them know he is writing a book.
Two weeks ago, he appeared on CNN with Brooke Baldwin to rub his detractor's noses in his heavenly vindication and to take deep umbrage that Ms. Baldwin would dare point out that America thinks Republicans suck.
When Baldwin brought up Republicans’ crumbling approval ratings, Delay accused her of pushing a “media narrative” with those numbers. “I have no narrative, sir,” she responded. “I’m just right in the middle, just asking the question.”
“I’m not attacking you, Brooke,” DeLay assured her, “but we saw how the media completely trashed Ted Cruz and others, trying to fight for what their people believe in.” He said despite the GOP’s effective loss, “out here in the real world, outside of New York and Washington, D.C., these people think Ted Cruz is a hero. They think that those Republicans in the House are heroes. And they think that Obama is destroying this country.”
Last week, Tom was at it again, appearing at an event hosted by the Texas Patriot Tea Party,
calling for a revolution. Or something.
“It’s time for a constitutional renewal, a constitutional revival,” DeLay said in Burleson, adding that this revival is inherently linked to a “spiritual awakening” he sees happening across the country. He said conservatives have allowed “the left to intimidate us, cut off our heads, put us in prison.”
“It’s time for a revolution,” DeLay said. “I am not advocating for revolution in the streets. But if that’s what it takes … ”
Witness the clarity ringing forth. "I want a revolution. I don't want a revolution. Except that I do want revolution!"
Tom seems to just be getting started though. This week he really brought the hammer down and laid out the Lord's plans for him. Appearing with the extremely well-balanced pastor John Hagee to pimp his upcoming book, Tom tells us that God has personally been in touch with him and revealed his path forward.
During a service last weekend, John Hagee spent a half hour interviewing former House Majority Leader Tom DeLay during which DeLay revealed that God has commissioned him to write a book and promised him that he'll play a role in the coming spiritual revival.
"Jesus died for our freedom," DeLay said. "And Jesus destroyed Satan so that we could be free and that is manifested in what is called the Constitution of the United States. God created this nation and God created the Constitution; it is written on biblical principles."
DeLay went on to recount a recent experience he had in which he spent four hours "on a conference call with the Lord" during which God told DeLay that he is to write a book called "Shut It Down" about the need for Constitutional revival. On top of that, God also told DeLay that He has heard the voice of His people and that "my awakening is beginning," in which DeLay will play a role:
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Silly me. I had always thought Christians believed that Jesus died for our sins. It turns out that it was for our freedoms and, with the second coming of Tom DeLay, we can be assured that his will shall be done, which I'm sure includes kicking that miserable Muslim out of their White House.
The Lord sure does pick out upstanding citizens to work through.