I wonder
what it would be like to be a daughter who was never nursed on her mother's blood and bruises
I wonder
what it would be like to have never worried for my daughters' safety
I wonder
what it would be like to not have sisters scared by violence and incest
I wonder
what it would be like to not have comforted friends when they summoned the infinite courage to talk about being raped.
I wonder
what it would be like to walk beneath a star lit sky freely, unburdened by worry about a passing car or an approaching figure
I wonder
who I would be, if I had been free to be all that I am
I wonder
what I would have been able to give my children - my sons and daughters.
I wonder
Because the earliest dreams are nightmares, colored in blood and cries.
I wonder
Because I remember my mother's silent struggle in the night as he tried to rape her, threatening to break her arm if she called for help.
I wonder
Because I remember how easily the dark rage would bloom in the bruises and tears of those I love.
I wonder
Because I remember the hurts we all carry
I wonder
Because I remember the fear in my sister's voice
I wonder
Because I understand the baseball bat a friend keeps by her door
I wonder
Because friends have shared their stories of rape, assault, of knives flying towards them
I wonder
Because I saw my daughters change as they became women, their bright brilliance dimming because the boys thought them too smart, too beautiful to leave alone
I wonder
Because we're taught to swallow our truths until we choke on them
I wonder
Because girls were torn from their school and families for daring to want an education
I wonder
Because on the news, yet another child pornography ring has been busted.
I wonder
Because girls and women are being kidnapped and sold as sex slaves
I wonder
Because girls and women are beaten every day, raped everyday, murdered everyday
I wonder
Because another 17 year old girl sauntered across the television screen wearing high heels and Victoria Secrets wings - just another body, just another thing.
I wonder
Because Republican officials want to probe my daughters' uteruses if they have a miscarriage, or decide to end a pregnancy.
I wonder
Because we know the dark underbelly of the flag wrapped beast, its exhausted erection of false identities and claims to power.
I wonder
Because yesterday a man thought he had the right to take the lives of young women as they dreamed of their futures.
I wonder
What happens when we ragged women, we beautiful women, we young women, we old women, we daughters, we sisters, we mothers, we friends, break the sky with our courage and say -