Opened my inbox this morning. Now I find myself strangely lonely. All my good friends who've been so attentive and eager to hang with me seem to have found other people to hang out with.
Hey, I thought we had a relationship.
It seems like only yesterday you were constantly sending me little notes, telling me how much you needed me, how I was the only one who really made a difference in your life.
Now, nothing. Where once my box overflowed with your tender sentiments, now it offers only gift cards and countdowns to Black Friday.
Not even...
From: Debbie Wasserman Schultz Subject: Sorry I Threw Your Money Away
From: Barack Obama Subject: Vor, I Should Have Listened
From: DSCC Subject: Boy, Did We Blow It!
From: DNCHQ Subject: Sure, You've Got a Republican Senate, But Check Out Our New Office Furniture
From: Michelle Obama Subject: Okay, Money Helps, But Should We Have a Message?
Heck, at this point, I'd settle for
From: DNCHQ Subject: Psych!