Now that the mid-term elections have passed it is time to get to work fixing everything that is wrong with America. Here are some items I am sure Congress on both sides of the aisle can agree upon.
Disband the Environmental Protection Agency as its only job is to inhibit the industrial greatness of our country.
Make unions illegal because those ungrateful people keep asking for too much, like the antiquated concept of a living wage.
Rescind Obamacare. If people took better care of themselves they wouldn’t need insurance.
Increase the Defense Department budget by 50% to address the ISIS menace here and abroad.
Deport all illegal aliens who are poor or uneducated. The smart ones can stay if they score better than 1200 on the SATs.
Disband the National Endowment for the Arts because it only encourages the wrong kind of people.
Limit income tax to only individuals making less than $125,000 a year and couples $200,000. This will allow the very rich to keep more of their money so it can trickle down in greater amounts to the 96%.
Increase the number of private prisons and fill them with potential Ebola patients.
Disband the SEC and allow Wall Street to continue its charitable campaign to help all Americans fulfill the American Dream.
Disband the FCC . That would also allow advertisers to hawk their wares for 22 minutes in every half hour of broadcast time. That would make us all better informed citizens.
Establish Federal Abortion Courts and Federal Abortion Clinics in every state capital.
Limit anonymous per party spending on negative campaign ads to $5 billion in local elections and $10 billion in national elections.
Offer tax incentives to corporations that ship their jobs to countries where people make less than a dollar a day and dream of coming to America.
Increase the budget of the TSA. So far they have spent 100 billion dollars and haven’t caught anyone trying to blow up a plane, so obviously they have to work harder and inconvenience more people.
Increase the minimum wage to $10.10/hour. That would make all Americans rich.
Move the Social Security Administration to Las Vegas and allow Americans to fund their retirement at their choice of tables--craps, roulette, or poker. Baccarat is only for the elite among us.
Stop worrying about climate change. If life on Earth becomes unsustainable we can always form a Congressional committee to study the problem.
Require all voters to show their Homeland Security National ID Card or be able to show a valid Social Security number tattooed on either their right or left buttock, depending on party affiliation.