The Heavenly Chronicles
"So, I was skyping (along with millions of others) the other day with the deity. She likes to stay in touch, update her status, let us know what's trending, you know. Oh, speaking of trending, she gave a huge thumbs up to the Walmart/fast food strikers and of course to the Ferguson/Garner protestors.
As it happens, she was greeting a few right wing evangelicals who had managed to squeeze in. Basically decent folks, kind to their families and their pets. Just got caught up in the lemming like undertow of religious certitude and the promise of salvation. It can happen.
They were standing there somewhat befuddled as she flung her rainbow scarf around her neck. Kind of stunned as they watch her change skin color every several minutes...from white, to tan, to oriental, to black. "Welcome", she smiled. "Now, just so you know, this isn't quite the top tier in the heavenly ladder, but we'll make it very comfortable for you. Look, we have a Noah's ark recreation center. Rosemary Clooney will be singing on weekends with Lawrence Welk at intermission. And you can turn on 50 and 60's oldies but goodies anytime you want as well as reruns of Leave it to Beaver and Father knows Best. Isn't that nice?"
Speaking into her headset, "Cesar, Cesar Chavez? Honey could you come and show these folks around? I know your (smiling at them briefly) 'background' is a bit of adjustment for them, but you are so good with newcomers."
And in answer to one of their questions, "No sweetie, we don't do the fire and brimstone thing anymore. Too old school. There are just different levels of comfort and joy although we do make sure no matter where you might end up you have food, shelter and health care. Speaking of which, sigh, we're going to have to demote some bankers again. Some of them actually made it to the feed the poor in Bangladesh and Kentucky tier, but then they got all cranky and demanding. Started trying to resell the donated food at a markup. We may have to send them back to the building solar panels on an asteroid section. Oh dear, we did have hopes for them. And of course, as I said, they will be decently taken care of."
Adjusting her microphone, "Peter, Peter...we have to crank it up now. We have an iconic civil rights leader from India coming in soon. We need to really make her welcome.
Enjoy everyone, just ask if you have questions. Take care."
And a tip: being kind to puppies, kitties and all animals counts a lot towards upgrading your status.
Special Holiday Session: In a recent special session, the deity, Lao Tsu, Mohammed, Buddha and other ascended masters joined hands to send a winter blessing in honor of the birthday of one of those who came to teach us compassion and mercy.
They held all of us in their hearts, but gave particular attention to those who work for peace, those who struggle with illnesses, those who are mired in bitterness, anger and destruction and the grief stricken families in Pakistan and Nigeria.
Merry Xmas, Happy New Year, Happy Kwanza, Happy (belated) Hannukah, Eid Saeed! (Muslim greeting for after Ramadan), Happy Vesak (Buddha's birthday).
Live Long and Prosper/sh