There's a rec-list meta tempest (perhaps in a teapot) going on today. It's all over a well-known poster and commenter who got banned yesterday.
I have only the barest understanding of the incident that led to the banning. I was off doing "important stuff" yesterday and never saw the diary or comment thread that set it all off. The individual in question is someone whose ID I recognize and with whom I've never had a problem. That isn't to say that this person has never caused a problem -- I don't read every comment thread in every diary, so a lot happens I never know about.
From my minimal understanding of the underlying kerfuffle, this well-known poster had a meltdown seemingly touched off by not getting enough recommends, but probably caused by something else that only he knows about.
OK...
I've been around here awhile. My UID has five digits and I've been a registered and reasonably active member since 2005. I first started reading DKos during the Kerry presidential campaign.
I haven't been engaged for every single day of those nine years. Sometimes I drift away and don't read DKos for weeks or months at a time. I've never done a GBCW though. I just don't read it for a while until whatever annoyed me dies down.
But overall, I've been engaged in political conversations here more than not. So, as an old timer, I'd like to offer some advice for staying sane while participating in online communities.
Follow me across the squiggle if you'd like some simple guidelines.
Staying Sane on the Internet
1. The first rule of Internet sanity:
Nobody gives a shit what you think.
Every time I post a diary or comment, before I hit the publish button, I repeat that mantra to myself. You might think I'm belittling myself, but no. I'm preparing myself to be ignored. You see, if the reason you're posting is to get those recs, you will always be disappointed. If you get 10, you'll wonder why it wasn't 25. If you get 30, you'll wonder why it wasn't 100.
There are a hundred reasons your diary or comment didn't get any attention. You posted at the end of a 600-comment thread and few people scroll down that far. You published your diary at the same time as eight diaries by high-profile posters hit and people only have so much time to read. You're the 85th person to opine on that subject. People start to read your diary and go "Huh?" because the point that seemed crystal clear to you, reads like word salad to people who aren't in your head...
I could go on and on. A high-readership, rec, positive feedback diary is a combination of writing skill, posting savvy (knowing when to post) and sheer luck.
So, if you post, post because you want to express something, not because you want the attention and adulation of all the people who think what you said was brilliant. If you want attention, go outside and hold up a sign that says, "LOOK AT ME!!!"
What you post may be brilliant (or not), and if you're lucky, people will pay attention to you.
Craving the attention just leads to disappointment. Post for YOU, not the audience.
2. Disengage sooner not later
Internet arguments go on ad nauseam. You are very unlikely to change anyone's mind in a comment thread. I won't say it's never happened, but it's one of those things like that flower that blooms once every hundred years.
One of my favorite cartoons (I think it's from XKCD) is of a man being called to bed. "I can't come right now," he says. "Somebody is wrong on the Internet."
Someone is always wrong in the Internet. You can argue and post facts until you melt, and people will still be wrong on the Internet. Chances are, at some time or another, the person who was wrong was you.
So, when the back and forth starts, give a couple of well-reasoned, carefully civil replies, then walk away. There just isn't anything to be gained by pounding on the send button.
3. You have the right to not read
File that one along with the right to remain silent and the right to sing the blues.
At the moment, there is at least one diary on the rec list that I will not read, ever. Why? Because the high-profile poster is someone I do not trust or respect. I'm not naming the diarist, because I'm not campaigning against him. A lot of people here respect him, and that is their privilege. If I were to open that diary and read it, steam would start coming out of my ears. I'd rather not feel that way, so I'm just going to pass that diary by without comment.
My list of "I won't read, EVER" posters is fairly short (no more than four or five out of the huge number of posters on this site).
No matter who you are and what your beliefs, there are a few people here who are going to get under your skin. It might be because you don't like their posting style, or the flavor of Democrat they are, or there's something you know about them that makes you think they couldn't possibly say anything you need to hear.
It doesn't matter why. Once you've identified someone who cheeses you off, just stay away. Let me repeat that, JUST STAY AWAY. Don't respond to their comments. Don't read their diaries.
Even if every word they have ever said is wrong, they have the right to say what they say. You don't have to listen, but they have the right to speak.
4. Never post GBCW
This goes back to the first rule of Internet sanity: Nobody gives a shit. If you bow out, DKos will go on as if you never left. Really. Even if you're a front pager.
By all means bow out. Everybody should now and then. Taking a break will do wonders for your sanity. The world is different from DKos and we all need a change of scenery from time to time.
You post GBCW because you want everyone to take notice and scream, "No! Don't leave!" And if they don't, you're going to feel a lot worse.
Just as in Rule 1, leave because you need a break, not because you want people to beg to you stay. If you're looking for that attention, you will always be disappointed.
Finally, DKos is a very large community. There are a lot of people here and they represent a lot of different ideas, belief systems and political stripes. Most are progressive Democrats, which makes it a comfortable place to come home to. But "progressive Democrat" is a vaguely enough defined term that you will always run into people who think differently than you do. Enjoy the differences, learn from people with different points of view, and step away if the differentness makes you uncomfortable or angry. Engage as long as the debates are civil, and walk away when they start getting uncivil.
And most of all, speak to express yourself. You may reach a large, receptive audience. But then again, you may not. Unless you were famous before you got here, there's no guarantee anyone is going to pay attention to you.
If today's diary sinks without a ripple on the surface, come back and try again later.
Just don't get upset with everyone else because they didn't make the effort to rec you.
ETA: Wow, Rec List... I guess it's my lucky day. (Thanks guys!)