Undertaking behavioral change is a process that spends a lot of time navigating gray areas. There may be a few clear-cut rules, but most of us are making it up as we go along, tailoring advice and methods to our own unique, messy lives. We confront and avoid, decide and rationalize, set and break goals, climb on and off wagons. The goal may be clear but the paths we take to get there tend to be full of potholes, detours, and confusing signage. Many of us fall into patterns of black-and-white thinking that doesn’t allow for the complexities and nuances and messy fits-and-starts nature of real-life events and actions. We want it to be clear-cut, with no room for error, so it’s easy to decide how to proceed. Binary thinking is appealing when we’re stressed out for that reason, but it can be a trap we unwittingly set for ourselves.
And if we accept that incremental change (and maybe even some backsliding) are okay—and will eventually, with effort, lead to “good enough for now” and maybe take us all the way to “perfect [for me]!” then we’re getting somewhere.
Who’s Your Little GUS Buddy?
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