Disclaimer: I am nearly incoherent with rage pretty much all the time these days, but even as challenging as it can be sometimes to endure and maintain that level of fury, or to imagine that it has not yet reached its peak, even still it is subject to the occasional dangerous spike. What follows is the product of one such spike, in the form of my thoughts on the recent revelation by Rep. Jackie Speier (D-CA) that Congress has paid out $15M in taxpayer money to settle harassment cases brought against its members. Please keep in mind that I am writing down these thoughts under the influence of an extreme rage that is more blinding and relentless than even my usual terrifying baseline, and I therefore can offer no warranty, express or implied, for what I might say here tonight.
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I will start by saying that this was $15M in PUBLIC MONEY used for the purpose of bailing out harassers and discriminators. That there has been no disclosure, no transparency, and no accountability of any kind for the MEMBERS OF CONGRESS who were the perpetrators of these career- and soul-destroying crimes.
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And I will say that We the People -- we the taxpayers -- bailed them out. And that they got away with it, no questions asked. We bailed them out without our ever even having the right to know we were doing it, let alone to voice our objections or to expel and prosecute the perpetrators and their enablers.
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I will also say that these unconscionable abuses of power were committed while the perpetrators served in PUBLIC OFFICE, while they enjoyed the power, status, and prestige of being members of Congress, not to mention the generous salaries, benefits, and incalculable perks that come with those jobs. Their abuses of power were committed while they strutted around pretending to serve the American people, pretending that they took seriously the sacred charge of public service, pretending that they were deserving of the respect that came with their offices. All the while they were free to commit crimes of harassment and discrimination with complete impunity and no reason ever to fear -- or to be deterred by -- any consequences for their criminal activities.
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I can't get my brain to assimilate any of this. My rage knows no bounds.
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You have people in your life who are still professing shock about how widespread all this harassment and abuse and discrimination and hostility really is, about how widely and deeply held the beliefs and ideologies that enable this kind of behavior really are in our culture? How widely and deeply held the beliefs in male primacy and supremacy, in the rightness and naturalness of female subordination, and in male entitlement to women's bodies, really are in our culture?
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Tell them about this. Tell them that we know now that these behaviors are condoned and enabled and covered up, and not in some furtive, unofficial, ad hoc kind of way but in official policies and procedures that have been institutionalized by the Congress of the United States of America, by the very people we employ to act in our collective best interests, who serve at the highest levels of government, and who more than anyone should understand and honor the great trust that has been placed with them.
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It is not going to come as news to most of the people reading these words that this is a sick, dangerous culture that we are living in, where racists and misogynists and homophobes and ableists and nativists and religious bigots and other people whose beliefs are dangerously and disqualifyingly at odds with their jobs (which are to serve the American people, ALL of us) control and dominate the structures of power, from industry to governance to everything else.
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This reality is becoming increasingly clear even to many of those who somehow did not see it before now, who have until recently been able to ignore or deny it. But it is much, much harder for most people to deny now that we have a self-described sexual predator masquerading as president of the United States. And his actions since assuming office have left us with no doubt that in addition to his disgusting misogyny he is also a racist, homophobic, ableist, nativist, xenophobe.
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But I will also say that none of this started with him. I will say that he is a product of this sickness, a particularly disgusting product, yes. But he is not its originator. He is its logical conclusion. Please God let us be close to the conclusion.
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And I will say that We the People are forced to support the poisonous deeds that are also products of this sickness, and to protect the perpetrators from the consequences of their actions, by paying off the victims with our own money, with the money we pay in taxes. We pay our taxes in good faith, maybe we grumble a little sometimes but mostly we pony up with the idea that kicking in to support the greater good is the right thing to do, that it is the AMERICAN thing to do. We pay our taxes, trusting (or at least hoping, although I think a lot of us are having trouble even with hope these days) that the people we elect to decide what to do with that money will take seriously the enormity of their charge and the sacredness of the trust that the American people have no choice but to place in them.
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How do we fix a cultural problem this big? Can it even be fixed? Or is this sickness the root of what ultimately does us in as a species?
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I have to say now that I don't have any answers. That instead all I have is blinding, relentless rage. And for now, I want to say thank you to Rep. Jackie Speier for exposing this monstrous truth, at what is no doubt great personal and professional risk to herself, for telling us — We the People — about this 100 percent unconscionable process for addressing harassment and discrimination when it is perpetrated by a member of our Congress.
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Finally, I will say that we all know that some people will continue to ask why so many women don't report harassment or abuse. I wonder how they will look at this example and still not understand that it is everywhere, all the time, all our lives. It is relentless. We have other things to do with our lives, such as live them as best we can despite the constant and relentless threat of real danger that every woman on the planet Earth has to contend with every day of her life. So, what is the best case scenario if she reports? Well, we know now for a woman harassed by a member of Congress what the best case scenario is if she reports. Maybe she will get a few bucks. I mean if she can get anyone to believe her, and even if she does present a sufficiently convincing case, her career will be derailed and in some cases completely destroyed. This kind of thing ruins lives.
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And she gets to see that her tormentor is 100 percent getting away with it. That he is getting to keep his high-status, high-power, high-paying job, that he is answering for nothing and probably never will, and that he is continuing to enjoy the attention and ass-kissing and other privileges that accrue to members of Congress by virtue of their offices. She may even see him on TV occasionally since the job he gets to keep includes seemingly unlimited opportunities to blather sanctimoniously about whatever bullshit or other is his particular game and seemingly unlimited opportunities to be paid attention to, to have his every utterance treated as newsworthy, and to be reported by a largely compliant (and complicit) media that treats elected public servants like rock stars and heroes deserving of worship.
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So, why don’t more women report? My question is why any woman ever does.