What message the First Lady was shouting with that jacket we will learn years from now, but last night one possibility snapped into place in my head and it helped me a great deal.
So thank you, Mrs. Trump. If you meant what I think you may have then god love you and bless you, you are my hero.
Because I really do not care.
Conflict is something I value. I care about lots of things, and conflict situations allow me to put almost all those aside but one. Those who know me well frequently worry I care too much about too many things, existing in a constant fugue state. But it’s what I enjoy and what gives me what modest skills I translate into a living. I care about my stuff and your stuff and the stuff we might have if we did all these things (here, let me tell you and we can debate it).
Until there is a conflict situation. I really don’t care. You’ll trash my car unless something something, but my friend is at risk? You can’t imagine how much I don’t care about my car, at this moment. Pouring gas on it just gives me a few more moments to work out how to end this, so please do. When it blows up you’re going to find it hard not to look at and maybe I can end this, if the engine block is hurled through my house I might find a chance to end this. Everything else is a problem for another day until I can end this conflict and can care about other things.
Almost everything is complicated, but conflicts are not. Because during a conflict the things I am willing to actively care about, right now, are few.
My opponent in a conflict wants me to do things and I’m not doing those things, I am solely doing the things I can to end this conflict first. Then I can be capable of caring about other things again. Smash the one thing I have from my grandmother. Scare my kids, do things that at any other time would be all I cared about.
I really, truly, right now just don’t care.
I really don’t care that Trump is making children suffer. I really don’t care that he is trashing Harley. I really don’t care that he called our closest allies names. I don’t care to spend any time I don’t have to catching the things he is throwing or burning or blowing up to give himself space to do what he really cares about.
And neither should you.