Got a letter from "Governor Scott Walker", who apparently wants to personally befriend me, and enlist me in the effort help "tackle the Union Bullies".
Two pages of claptrap, a donation form ("I've got your back Scott") and a copy of a WSJ article entitled "Wisconsin Democrats Ready Effort To Recall Governor Scott Walker" I'm a little surprised their isn't a greeting card type recording of scary music in the fold.
Ohs Noze! I haz a urge to "help"!! I think I'll wipe my ass with a dollar bill and mail it back in the convenient postage paid envelope. Or 13.1 ounces of pennies to force a Priority Mail cost.
Initially, I wondered how the hell "Friends of Scott Walker" got my damn name and address, including middle initial. Wherever they got it, what the fuck did I do to make anyone think I was a "Fellow Conservative"?? And why would a Wisconsin group of asshats supporting this creepy P.O.S. think it's "fiscally responsible" to spend a half dollar sending me a request for money in Maryland?
I only opened the envelope because I've been fascinated by the efforts of the Wisconsin Kossaks, and I have a $20 bet with a conservative relative that Walker will be removed from office for having the temerity to fuck with organized labor the way he did. (Temerity, asshattiness, silly bravado, who knows why he thought he could get away with that shit?)
Here is my very personal and heartwarming begging for money contribution form from the Wisconsin soon to be ex Governor complete with a handy credit card section to make it that much easier for me to send money:
The Post It Fax Note covers my name and address only. (it's a handy leftover from a bygone era in my desk drawer)
And here is the very personal and heartwarming request to "stop them now"
Obviously, there's "Big Trouble Ahead" where I live and it looks like the crisis might be spreading as the "too powerful labor unions" spread their evil after the Wisconsin "test case". (Again, where did these assholes get my name and address? That's really bugging me)
Notice down near the bottom, they couldn't help but mention the attack organizations of "liberal billionaire George Soros". Must be a real boogah boogah for conservatives to pee their pants over the one billionaire liberal they can mention. I don't see any references to the Koch's on this letter anywhere. Just a post script mentioning St. Ronnie and how he (like Gov. Walker) did the "right thing" and "had the fortitude" take "them on 30 years ago".
So, should I bother de-bunking this claptrap line by line and send it back? Nah, it will just end up in the shitcan and be read by a single young republican staffer who will no doubt snort derisively and roll his/her eyes before tossing it.
Tempting to sprinkle some baby powder in the envelope and mail it from nearby Fort Dietrich.
(I know, I know... not advocating that, just thinking out loud)
It's always interesting to me to peel back the veneer of competence and show how truly desperate poor Snotty Walker is to resort to this pitiful plea for money, insinuating that those evil liberals "must be stopped NOW" or
coming to your state
spreading like an evil cancer
with only Scott Walker to defend you from:
The Right of Workers to Bargain Collectively
AAAAAAAGHGHGGHGHG oh no!!! NOT THAT. Oh the agony!!!!! I must find myself some pearls to clutch.
Right after I take a Scott and wipe my Walker and stuff an envelope.
Gotta go, need to get out early this morning so I can stop by the Post Office on my way to work where my coworkers are still allowed to collectively bargain all they want.
Just the way I like it.