Sorry, Dan Quayle, records are meant to be broken. Move over, as there is a new King Queen of Comedy, The Thrilla From Wasilla.
Mike Luckovich, Editorial Cartoonist for the Atlanta Journal-Constitution and echoing the sentiments of hundreds of his colleagues, issued the following statement of support upon hearing that Governor Sarah Palin (R-AK) had channeled boxer Roberto Duran in her "No Mas" Speech this past Friday from Wasilla, Alaska
"This is a very sad day for me and others in my profession. Never in the long history of editorial cartooning has so much been owed by so many to one person."
David Fitzsimmons, Arizona Daily Star
Republican Strategist and all-around good guy Bill Kristol, who was former Vice President Dan Quayle's Chief of Staff from 1989-1993, issued the following statement which was interpreted as a backhanded compliment to his former boss
"I knew Dan Quayle. Dan Quayle was a good friend of mine. But he is no Sarah Palin who, all by herself, occupies a unique position in American politics."
R.J. Matson, Roll Call
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Hall of Famer and former Los Angeles Lakers center Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, who knows a thing or two about basketball, watched Palin's announcement with great interest
"I played with someone who is widely considered to be the best point guard in the history of professional basketball. As great a player as Magic Johnson was, I have to say that Sarah Palin may have been a better point guard. I was dazzled by her 'No Look' passes which often resulted in easy baskets for her team. Instead of winning 5 campionships like Magic and I did for the Lakers, who knows we might have won 7, 8, even 10 titles had Palin, and not Magic, been my teammate for the 'Showtime' Lakers of the 1980's.
Jeff Darcy, Cleveland Plain-Dealer
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Famous torturer and big game hunter Dick Cheney was aghast at the lack of hunting etiquette displayed by Palin
"I have bagged many a moose and tiger back in the day. I am simply appalled at Palin's indifference and lack of concern towards animals. Once you kill 'em, you gotta skin 'em"
Vic Harville, Stephens Media Group
Pat Oliphant, Universal Press Syndicate
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World-renowned Casanova and sometimes-Governor of South Carolina Mark Sanford (R-SC) found time from his important trade mission to Brazil to chime in
"In some respects, Governor Palin and I are soulmates. Both of us are known for our love of nature and bridges. I can say without any hesitation that I feel her pain."
J.D. Crowe, Mobile Register
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Television star Tim Allen, whose sitcom Home Improvement showed many Americans how to improve wiring in their houses, had this observation
"Among other things, I am a wiring expert. The wiring on this lady is simply beyond my comprehension."
Kevin Siers, Charlotte Observer
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Jean Dixon, whose ability to predict the future is scary, had this reaction
"Oh dear!"
Tony Auth, Philadelphia Inquirer
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Michele Bachmann (R-MN), America's foremost expert on the census, had a question for Palin
"So, Sarah, if you live in Alaska but spend most of the next few years in Iowa and New Hampshire, could we still count you as an American citizen in the 2010 Census?"
Lisa Benson, Daily Press (CA)
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The embattled Chairman of the Republican National Committee Michael Steele (R-Adrift) was ecstatic that Palin would now spend all her time helping to rebuild the Republican Party
"I am delighted that Governor Palin will be joining me in campaigning for our congressional candidates throughout this great land of ours. Onwards to victory in 2010 and beyond!"
Dave Granlund, Politicalcartoons.com
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Former President Richard Nixon issued what many have construed as a rather defensive statement
"I came back from the dead and so will Sarah Palin. I should tell you that I am not a crook and neither is Governor Palin."
Mark Streeter, Savannah Morning News
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Ever the gracious winner, President Barack Obama found time from his busy schedule in Russia to offer this comment to reporters
"Given her intellect, fertile mind and expertise in Russian history, I know Governor Palin is someone who badly wanted to look deep into Prime Minister Vladimir Putin's soul and offer him some neighborly love. I just wanted to assure her that she may well get that chance in coming years."
Rob Tornoe, Politicker.com
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From outer space in a galaxy far, far away, Mr. Spock displayed his trademark rationality in assessing the Palin situation
"Nowhere am I so desperately needed as among a shipload of illogical humans."
Chan Lowe, South Florida Sun-Sentinel
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John McCain, who spent 5 1/2 years as prisoner of the North Vietnamese during the Vietnam War, had plucked Palin out of near-obscurity last year and put her on the 2008 Republican ticket. He was more philosophical in his approach
"I spent a number of years in the Hanoi Hilton and I can tell you Sarah Palin is very lucky to escape the hell hole that is the State of Alaska. I fully support her and need I remind you that this is good news for John McCain."
Stuart Carlson, Universal Press Syndicate
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Keith Olbermann, the host of MSNBC's 'Countdown,' was so impressed that he listed Palin among the "Best Persons in the World." However, if you watched the show earlier tonight, you know he changed his mind and decided to do an uncharacteristically brief 'Special Comment' before he signed off
"WTF???"
John Darkow, Columbia Daily Tribune
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About to spring free from Sing Sing Prison (or, as some call it, Alaska), Sarah Palin was deeply moved by this outpouring of support. Satisfied that she had made the correct decision and reached all her objectives, she called it a night and went to sleep.
So ended another exciting episode or, as reporters called it, One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich Sarah Palin.
Developing...